Let me start by saying, it has been so long since I have taken the time to sit down and write on here, that it feels somewhat strange to be doing so now. My life has changed drastically, but for the better, in the past couple of months and I honestly could not be more grateful for that. In an effort to keep improving & growing, I decided to post a list of my personal goals for 2018. In a sense, I feel like posting things on here & knowing that other people are reading what I am writing (hopefully), holds me a little more accountable to sticking to the goals that I am making. Anyways, here they are…..
- First & foremost, I want to work on getting my anxiety under control. In the past couple of years, I feel like my anxiety has gained an increasing amount of control over my life. Some times I don’t follow through with plans because I’m so anxious about leaving the house. Anxiety has ruined relationships & opportunities for me that I may never get back & I am over it. So what am I going to do about it? When I feel an anxiety attack coming on, I need to work on talking myself through it. Breathe. Take the time to make sure that I am feeling well & to not be ashamed if sometimes that relief isn’t instant. To not be ashamed that I may have some bad days, but knowing that I will get through them. I’ve considered seeing a therapist, which is a big step for me, but it’s also pretty pricey. Now that I commute to work on the train every day, I have a lot of extra time to read, so I’ve been reading articles written by therapists about how to get your anxiety under better control. What I’ve found so far, is that slowing down & taking life one step at a time is key.
- Becoming more aware of my financial situation. I’ve sort of been seeing someone who works in finance & talking with him about his work has really opened my eyes to what my options are when it comes to saving. I’ve never been someone who has saved money. For small things here & there, yes. But I’ve never really had an actual savings account where I put aside money every paycheck. I have finally began to do that, & let me just say it feels great. I also would have never described my financial situation as “secure.” I am still not there yet, but I am getting there. Keep in mind, I am only 23, but regardless, I’m learning. For the first time in my life, I’ve started thinking about investing & building my credit. I hope to not only have a better understanding about what my options actually are by the end of the year, but to have also began actively taking part in them.
- Next, I would like to try some type of new workout class that I genuinely enjoy doing. I have always liked working out, but I go through phases of actually keeping up a schedule & consistently doing it. The reason I specifically want to find a class is because I have always wanted to do something like a cycling class or kickboxing, but my anxiety has held me back from doing so. I took a zumba class for a couple of months a few years ago & absolutely loved it, but after falling out of the routine of it I wasn’t able to comfortably get back in to it. My goal for this year is to find one that I genuinely enjoy doing & to turn it in to a hobby.
- Another goal that I have already made a lot of progress on in the past couple of months is to be okay with being alone. I haven’t technically been in a relationship in about 3 or 4 years, & for a very long time, I craved being with someone else. It was to the point where it was unhealthy. I became very attached to people who I had only been talking to for a couple of weeks & I would try to force relationships with them. In the past couple of months, I have made the decision to stop focusing so much on my love life & to put my career first. My goal is to grow more as a person & to build myself up before I decide to start looking for love again. I spend way to much time trying to give others love, when I never feel like I get it in return. So I’m taking time off from loving others romantically to love myself a little more. I have to love myself & put myself first before I try to love another person. Once I get better at that, I think my future relationships will be a lot more healthy & have a lot more potential to last.
As time goes on I’m sure I will come up with more, but for now these are my main areas of focus. Updates to come 🙂