For some reason, when you’re getting over someone, it helps and it makes you feel better, to make some drastic change to your appearance. I’ve talked to a handful of my girl friends and they all agreed and said that they do the same, so I know I’m not alone in this. My only explanation for this, is that you are taking away something that was a part of you while you were with this other person, or you are adding something to yourself that they never experienced when they were with you. For example, after calling it quits with a guy who I used to date, I chopped off 10 inches of my hair. He loved my long hair, and cutting it off felt like it was the final straw in also cutting him out of my life. I was letting go of something that reminded me of him. I was changing my appearance so that it would be different than the time that I spent with him. I remember spending hours laying in bed with him after we had both finished classes for the day. He’d play with my hair as I lay my head on his chest or push it back gently behind my ear as it fell in my face when I leaned in to kiss him. So when I chopped it off, it was like I was letting go of those moments that I thought of so often. I was doing what I could to assure myself that if I ever found myself with someone else, those things wouldn’t happen and I wouldn’t think of him. The same way when I broke up with my high school boyfriend of 2 years, I got my nose pierced. It wasn’t a huge change, but it was something that was unfamiliar to him. I knew that the next time that I saw him, he wouldn’t recognize that part of me. It was my way of saying, whether you are in my life or not, I’ll still move on. You do not make my decisions for me, and there are parts of me that you will never know. I will grow and I will change, and it will be without you.
This came to mind because I’m currently going through this again and trying to decide what major change to make to myself. Maybe I’ll cut my hair again or maybe I’ll get another piercing or maybe I’ll do both. More updates to come.