i’m changing like the seasons

I’ve been feeling a major sense of change lately as I discussed in my last post, but I’m starting to think that maybe it goes deeper than the seasons. I think it has a lot to do with the changes taking place with my family, my love life, and just with myself in general as I’m starting to get older and I’m about to graduate college. The other day, my horoscope told me that it’s time for me to embrace and to “change my sheets.” I think that the change my sheets part was a metaphor for ridding my life of the things that I’m still holding on to. I’ve been holding on to this little piece of hope for months now hoping that things will work out with the guy that I’m in love with. We both keep trying to make it work, and every time he says he’s done, he always comes back. And I do the same. But with the time change and the distance and him getting our of work when I go into work and vice versa, it feels impossible. Still, I’ve been patient. I’ve been understanding. I’ve given him space to figure things out. All the while, I’ve been ignoring the fact that it has to stop at some point because it’s really starting to take a toll on my happiness. I think he’s realized this too and knows that it’s time to move on. I think I’m finally ready to move on. I know that it’s going to be crazy hard, but hopefully within a couple months, I’ll feel better about it. So I’m trying to “change the sheets of my life.” As far as my family goes, I’m trying to grow in my relationships with my mom and brother which life has taken a toll on recently. I’m trying to go visit my sister more and to spend more time with my little nephew. I think right now it would be best for me to just focus on school and work and my family. I think it will help me take my mind off of my love life situation and just allow me to be happier in the long run.

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