Our problems are a lot smaller than they seem.

It’s been a rough summer thus far. Yesterday, it felt like my entire  world was crashing down around me. I woke up in the mood to be happy. I made a cup of coffee, started listening to my favorite podcast and was writing a blog post about my sex and the cityesque friendship. When I got my first dreaded phone call. After that a string of events happened that just made me feel like everyone was out to get me. I’m annoyed with myself as I write this, because I feel whiny. Like I want someone to read it and feel sorry for me. But I don’t. I don’t want that at all. I just want everyone to stop asking me why I’m not happy and for treating me like I’m just being dramatic when I can’t find happiness in pointless shit that is what my everyday life has become. There was a point yesterday when I was so upset that I thought to myself, “it’s always going to be like this. it’s never going to get better.” I decided to go outside for some fresh air and to take a puff or two of a cigarette (an awful habit that I’ve picked up lately because of being so stressed out. I wanna say that I’m going to stop doing it soon, but as I’m writing this I can’t stop thinking about how great one sounds). As I was sitting on my porch, feeling the sunlight on my face and the peacefulness of the breeze, I realized that even though it felt like everything in my life was coming to a halt, nothing else in the world had stopped. Every other person was still going about their day, the wind was still blowing and the sun was still shining. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in my own problems that I forget that there is so much more out there. And things will somehow always work themselves out. I just need to stop freaking out and take a deep breath. Life doesn’t stop for us, so we shouldn’t stop just because it’s not going our way.

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